Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Back in the saddle again...

Ok so this picture is like two years old, but still, what a better time to use it than with THAT blog title!??! Seriously... I give myself a rousing, "Well played!". And seriously, I'm not really that heavy... that vest is REALLY poofy! (I'm not fat, I'm big boned!)

It seems like when life gets super busy, the first thing to go is my blog. That bums me out because I certainly enjoy writing, er, well RAMBLING, but sometimes you just have to cut things out, ya know? I've finally realized after a long long time, that sometimes we just can't do all the things we'd like to do. When my life gets insane, as it has been for the last month or so, I just have to put the fun stuff on hold for a smidge. I'll always come back, I heart my readers too much... not to mention, I'm like cockroaches, I just won't die!

These last few months have really been an eye opening experience for me. I left teaching and quit my job because I wasn't happy. I thought I was ready to move on, but ultimately, after a few months went by, and everyone else got to go back to school and I didn't, I realized that I really missed teaching. I really like being creative and combining things in such a way that it makes kids WANT to come to class and learn with me, and I genuinely miss that. I also miss having a sort of regular routine. Granted, when I was teaching I was working a truck load, but it was predictable. Now, I can't predict anything and taking time off means losing money, not just burning sick leave. It's a very different world living like this. So, the bottom line is that I've been spending a lot of time trying to get back into the classroom. I've made countless phone calls, send tons of emails, rewritten my resume for an education format, filled out TENS of applications but yet, nada. My leaving my county five days after their official deadline has really hurt me. The prejudice following me is hurting any chance I have and it's frustrating. I'm trying not to let it get me down, and I'm thinking that somewhere there is a principal who will understand that I'm not a bad person/teacher, but the longer this goes, the more disheartened I get. I'm going to keep at things, like I always do, I guess it's just that cockroach mentality, just don't die! But we'll see how things shape up financially over the next few months.

I'm still finding time to volunteer with Operation Ward 57, and I have to say, while not teaching certainly sucks, having the time to volunteer has been priceless. I have an even greater appreciation for our men and women in uniform now than I ever did, and it feels good to be able to somehow give back. I am working to try to actually get a wounded warrior cert brought to DC for these guys, all at the request of a patient. So, we'll see if I'm able to accomplish that for him or not, but it's nice to at least try!

As for CF... it's been a whole new experience for me since coming back from my hiatus. I still hate running, and I definitely have my days where I feel totally pootastic, like the running days, but in all, it's finally getting fun again. I'm enjoying lifting again, and even the days that I'm not lifting, I'm beginning to enjoy. That competitive part of me wishes that I was a lot faster and could keep up on metcon days, but the rationale part of me knows that right now, I'm not focused on training to be the best. I'm focused on training because I want to stay healthy. I'm not the slimmest I've ever been right now, but I'm still a solid size 8/10 and that for me I think is healthy. I wish I was about 5-10 pounds lighter, but working the way I'm working, and being around restaurant food ALL the time makes dieting a wee harder than in the past. I'm doing what I can to keep in the box and keep the weight off, and when my resolve is strong, I make good choices. When it's not, oh boy, I certainly enjoy what the restaurant has to offer. :P

All in all, life right now is ok. It's not the best, but it's not the worst either. I just need to keep hanging in there. I need to keep moving and checking and trying to find the next big thing for me. If anyone happens to be in the DC area with a few connections to principals looking for a good elementary teacher, by all means, please let me know. I'd be happy to send you my resume to pass on for me... LOL. Until that happens though, I'm going to keep hitting the box, working hard, and volunteering because it makes me feel good. I'm back in the saddle. I've got the reigns and I'm moving the horse in the right direction. We just need to get there. But what about you, are you in your saddle right now?

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